Demos For a Stranded Heart

songs for anxious attachment babes

i've been writing and recording as i go a lot the past few years, and felt i needed to collect and put them somewhere. so demos for a stranded heart came along. as i looked back a pattern started to emerge, one i have known well since i first started crushing at four.

i wanted to capture how that pattern feels with these songs - the initial sense that you've met the person who will fix all your lifelong longing, the adrenalised romanticised chase, the let down when you do or don't get them, the anger and grief that comes up when you realise that not one person will fix that ache. and the steps towards what healing this sort of attachment might look like, which is still new.

something i feel is that anxious attachment makes for the best love songs. this material matters to me, who doesn't get something from a good love song? even as i work towards being more secure, i still find value in diving into whatever unhinged emotions and beliefs i have about a person and a relationship. as a practice to expel all the insanity i can feel towards the other, to explore those intense depths of how much we, as anxious attachment folks, desiredesiredesire our rescue and to neverevereverever be abandoned and to be held and held and held more than one pair of arms can hold. yikes... and of course <3 what it's all really trying to say underneath the signal cries. and then it's about the realness, genuine relation, something more gentle and at a different pace, less based in fear, yet still just as exciting when you start to recognise it for what it is. and it fluctuates, this is what i am learning.

i hope these songs hold you or help you understand those anxious sweethearts in your life :]

album art is me in my wedding dress age six or seven, no doubt crushing hard and buying wooden snakes for a boy every week cause he said they were his favourite